Paula Exton Case Study
Notes from conversation with Paula Exton (13.05.04)
Heard of EFT (DGAA):
I had no other option, but found it dreadfully hard to except that I needed help. A very supportive friend told me about the Trust and encouraged me to apply for help. She said: ’You deserve help, you don’t have to live in abject poverty.’ I consequently searched the directory in the library and applied at the Trust for help.
EFT has helped with:
- Bills
Being faced with a bill can make you feel suicidal. All they (the companies) want is your money and they don’t care about you or the difficulties you are up against. Thanks to EFT I no longer have to live in terror of unpaid bills.
- Car maintenance (security)
I live in a rural area and the public transport is poor. Without my little car going anywhere would be very difficult. Thanks to the EFT I’m confident that I can keep it in good running order and that I am safe. The financial help from the Trust is a security.
- Household equipment: toaster, kettle, VCR/pursuing Open University degree
Often things brake down and I am faced with replacing them. It exasperates the way you already feel at the time. It’s terrible.
When my VCR broke down, I could buy a new one. It’s not pure entertainment value, but I do a Humanities degree (History of Film and TV, 6 years course) at the Open University and a lot of their material comes on video. It helped me pursue my course, which is very therapeutic and confidence building.
- Food
The small weekly allowance eases the financial pressure. Instead of having to shop on a real economy basis and just buy the cheapest food, the extra financial support has helped me change my perspective to buy better, more nutritious food. I am very conscious of the importance of giving your body the nutrition it needs to function better. It helps my wellbeing. It eases my situation and gives me security.
- Clothes (acceptable outfit for when seen in public)
I was in a state of incredible shabbiness and you can survive it only for so long. It’s soul-destroying to have to rely on hand-me downs, and clothes from charity shops. I looked like a bag lady and it was just so depressing. Charity shops are wonderful, but it takes a lot of time and energy to find something decent and as part of my condition I loose energy very quickly. Thanks to the EFT I have now clothes I can wear into town without feeling shabby.
- Pets
My pets (4 cats, 1 dog) are very important to me, they’re part of my survival. I gained two of my four cats by default, (the other two are 17 and 18 years old). They were given to me as they needed a new home. All in all my pets are a happy gang. They are my responsibility. They give me unconditional love. They are a tremendous incentive for getting up in the morning. I get incredible joy from taking the dog out and watch him run in the fields. They give a quality to my life, which nothing else does. It doesn’t matter how ghastly you are feeling, what you look like or what’s wrong with you. They show concern for you, they give me the will to live. They are very sensitive to how you feel.
Life without EFT:
- Unable to pay bills (huge worry – depressing, suicidal)
- No car (trapped – rural area)
- No money to replace basic household equipment (abject poverty)
- No money to buy clothes (self-esteem – felt like bag-lady, confidence)
- Couldn’t have pursuit Open University degree (confidence building)
- No pets (unconditional love, will to live)
Life before EFT:
I was at a stage where everything was dropping to pieces. I didn’t even have money to replace my bedding, which was falling apart. I was looking around trying to think what I can afford to replace.
Benefit system/EFT:
At the EFT you are treated as an individual. You don’t have to fit into a particular box the way you have with the benefit system. You are accepted as the person you are. You are seen by someone (volunteer visitor) who knows where you are coming from. Being part of the EFT is like having a lifeline out there which isn’t the system and which cares.
Living on benefits makes you feel terribly insecure. They can suddenly whip it away with no apparent reason. The benefit system makes you jump through hoops, you have to beg, to crawl, and it just makes you want to give up. At the EFT you are taken as an individual, this is just how the benefit system should be. Instead, you are made to feel that you don’t deserve it. It doesn’t surprise me that there’s so much unclaimed benefit. You are up against a wall of bureaucracy and form filling. You’ve got to fit rigid criteria. There was no form for mental health problems. Just physical ones and I had to fit it in with their physical criteria. It’s discriminating. I think the system is changing this now.
Life’s circumstances that tipped the boat:
I have long-term mental health problems and have to cope with anxiety, depression, paranoia, exhaustion and feeling up and down all the time. I am unable to take up paid employment. Before I married I was an artist, a creative photographer. I did portray work and had exhibitions. When I married and had my daughter I focused on bringing her up. I worked as a care assistant and did voluntary work at my daughter’s school. My marriage brake-down was the last straw among a series of things. It was the breaking point and I had a total nervous break-down. I tried to pick photography up again after my break-down, but I no longer had the confidence or the energy. I was surrounded by financial fears, and problems seem just too huge before I applied at the EFT.
